Saturday 24th September 2005 Philosophers 0 (0) vs.(6) 9 Garnett B

Garnett began their first game with a doubt about it even taking place. The referee, who was apparently residing within a mile of the ground, did not show up and could not be contacted. A search was made for a replacement and, just as the teams were about to kick off under a gentlemen’s agreement, a kind and willing spectator took the whistle.

It did not take Garnett long (admittedly against a 10 man Philosophers team still playing 3 up front) to exert control. Some chances had already been created when mom Cox controlled a chipped pass from Dawnay and calmly slotted the ball past an advancing goalkeeper. With the green and blacks camped on the edge of the box, Philosophers endeavoured to prevent them the space needed to calve out further openings, until Dawnay decided to flight the ball over the defence and keeper from 25 yards. This piece of audacity opened the floodgates and a half cleared attack was resumed with a cross from Marshall that was thumped into the top corner by a bemused defender. A neat move on the edge of the area saw shots from Jones and Dawnay saved, only for Jones to despatch the second rebound. Shots continued to rain in on the poor Philosophers’ goal and a Jones header was saved on the line by an outstretched defender’s arm, without even an appeal being made for a penalty. Marshall was getting increasingly anxious about missing out on the potential goal feast and snatched at a number of chances. Eventually though Marshall was sent clear by a Jones through ball and calmly finished amid claims for offside. Soon he had despatched a second to make the score line 6:0 at halftime.

The second half began with the only prolonged period of possession that Philosophers had in the game. Failure to close down this possession allowed a couple of dangerous crosses to come in, but their attempt to play a little more football did open spaces behind the Philosophers’ defence. On the counter attack, Garnett should have more than doubled their half time score. A combination of some excellent saves by the replacement goalkeeper and remarkable generosity on the part of the Garnett strikers kept the score in single figures. A half cleared corner was fed back in to the near post by Ford and Jones turned the ball over his shoulder on the volley into the roof of the net. Other chances followed for hat tricks for both Jones and Marshall. Both forced saves from the keeper and Jones hit the post and had the rebound handled, but should really have scored. Dawnay and Cox both managed to miss chances from only a yard out before Marshall found Walworth in a similar position and he made no mistake. In the final minutes Gault bundled the ball home after a goalmouth scramble and then sloped away hoping his poor positional sense had gone unnoticed. The final score was a new Garnett B record of 9:0.

Moment to remember: Norman Hobbs forgetting how to fall over when he got a knock on the head.

Author: Gaffer

Team: E.Shaw, P.Gault 1, A.Powers, A.Robins, L.Harris, G.Dawnay 1 (c), J.Cox 1 (MoM), D.Ford, A.Walworth 1, K.Jones 2, L.Marshall 2